Isn't amazing how people who are not in love are so quick give advice to those who are? Especially obnoxious is someone who wants to lecture you on what love is or isn't, implying that the pain you are suffering is not because you love someone but because of some failing where you've mistaken something else for love? Or that you are hurting because of some unresolved childhood thing? How quick to blather human beings are. Perhaps because they are so afraid of their own pain. Silence and presence are so much more valuable. I am becoming quieter about these things as I grow older, about all things that have no answer, and some things just don't. I believe the Buddha, or someone in that line of transmission, said that there are things that are imponderable. Let them be.